(cont'd from home page) it was better to leave the t.v. downstairs. We take turns picking our vacations. You agreed to sign off on my new car but in exchange I agreed to try sushi at least three times without any sarcastic comments. Gettting to those agreements can be challenging at first, but the beauty of the situation is that the process we develop for you to employ when disagreeing is reusable – it will be something you return to over and over again over the course of your marriage. The bottom line is that disagreement can be the best part of marriage. Most conversation in marriage (regrettably) is about the weather, what’s for dinner, who’s picking up the kids at shool, or whether the bills have been paid. Disagreements are the time that you talk about your beliefs about marriage, your own childhood experiences, your philosophy of childrearing, what sort of person you believe your spouse is, and so on. Disagreements are really the richest part of marriage – and they are inevitable. So let’s get good at disagreeing!
Of course, these are just two basic areas in which couples often need help. In couple’s therapy we can talk about the in-laws, about parenting, about finances, about sexuality, about household chores, about job planning, about kindness, about same-sex friends, about infidelity, about use of the internet, about retirement, about attention to healthy living, and about anything and everything else that needs tending to in your relationship. There’s work to be done, but usually a lot of progress is made!